The Childrens Dept is all about “beautiful things for little people that big people love” and I am a big person who loves these amazing Altered Vintage Plates from Los Angeles artist Angela Rossi. Check out all the limited pieces in the Mama Needs a Present category. Duchess Cyclops, Timeless Tiger, can it get any better? Hell yes!
Bruce - Matilda The Musical Consider a slice Or even two, Bruce… Might have been nice, But even you, Bruce, Have to admit Between you and it There’s not a lot of difference in size.
[Choruses - overlapping:]
[Chorus - Group 1:] He can’t! He surely can’t! He surely can’t! He might explode. He’s going to blow. Make him stop! I can’t watch!
[Chorus - Group 2:] He can! Bruce! You are the man, Bruce! He’s quite elastic! He’s fantastic! Look at him go!
[Chorus - Both Groups:] And we made a bet This must confirm, Bruce, But we all suspected You have a worm, Bruce, Or maybe your largeness is A bit like a TARDIS - Considerably roomier inside.
[Chorus - Group 1:] He can’t! He surely can’t! He surely can’t!
[Chorus - Group 2:] He can! Bruce! You are the man, Bruce!
[Chorus - Both Groups:] B-R-O-O-C-E!
[Bridge 1:] Bruce! The time has come To put that tumbly tum to use. You produce, Bruce, Fantastically enthusiastic gastric juice.
Ohh… Eat it up. Lick it up. Suck it up. Whatever you do, don’t chuck it up, And muck it up!
[Bridge 2:] Come on, Bruce, be our hero! Cover yourself in chocolate glory!
[Chorus 1:] You’ll never again be subject to abuse, For your immense caboose! We should call a truce, Bruce. With every swallow you are tightening the noose. We never thought it was possible, But here it is coming true. We can have our cake and eat it too!
[Bridge 3:] Bruce! The time has come To put that tumbly tum to use. There’s no excuse, Bruce. Let out your belt. I think you’ll want your trousers loose.
Oooooh! Stuff it in. Bruce! You’re almost finished. Bruce! You’ll fit it in. Whatever you do, just don’t give in. Bruce! Don’t let her win! Bruce!
[Bridge 2:] Come on, Bruce, be our hero. Cover yourself in chocolate glory.
Go on, Bruce, do it!
[Chorus 2:] You’ll never again be subject to abuse, For your immense caboose. We should call a truce, Bruce. Just one more bite and you’ll have Completely cooked the goose. We never thought it was possible, But here it is coming true. We can have our cake and eat it…
“This isn’t your typical love story…” opens the trailer for a movie about a white, heterosexual, cisgender, able-bodied, middle class, and likely loosely Christian couple who find each other through serendipity and a very small amount of actual work.
It’s been less than two months short of a year since I posted a polka-bluegrass cover of Taio Cruz’ hit song, Dynamite. Since then, I’ve been wondering how I’d ever manage to top it. Only time will really tell if I’ve managed to pull it off with this cover of Love In This Club, originally performed by Usher and Young Jeezy. I’m sorry it took me so damn long. I’m not actually sorry. I am. No. I’m not. I’m sorry.
If you happened to dig this track and, for reasons beyond my personal understanding, would like to be able to listen to it at your leisure on your own personal music players, you can grab a download of it here. And if lossless versions are your thing, here’s a zip of some of those too.
Also, it would be horrendously remiss of me to not give a huge plug to the very talented (and always bursting with real fruit flavour) Vondell Swain, who did an amazing job with the album artwork.
When I was a very young writer I found myself using pseudonyms a lot: I wrote for magazines, and wrote too much, so when Neil Gaiman had written too many reviews Richard Grey would take over; and because Neil Gaiman reviewed films for one magazine then Gerry Musgrave had a film review column in another… for that matter I edited a handful of magazines when the real editors were on holiday or fired, and anything that got written by me was written under pen-names, house names, or just whatever occurred to me.
And after a while I had enough of it. I wrote a short story for 2000AD about a man who had his pseudonyms surgically extracted.
So I’ve never really spoken about this but I’ve been seeing that “list of useless degrees” article hanging around a lot today and I want to write a bit about my degree.
As of today I have 56 working days left before our Show opens and I’m sat in my reasonably large studio space surrounded by people who are genuinely passionate about art and creativity and in the other room is Bill, the best technician we could wish for and ahhhh I’m so fortunate.
Deciding to do a degree in something I enjoyed and that I could spend 3 full years doing and not go crazy or get bored or feel like it was a waste was the best decision a 17 year old me could have made. I picked a Uni I feel comfortable in and, yes, I suppose, I was lucky and skilled enough to get onto the course here that not everyone could do.
I could rant for ages about the cost of Uni but it has been manageable and I’d take the loans I have to repay over not coming to Lancaster any day.
I will graduate with a BA that has taught me to work independently to my own deadlines, to set deadlines by authority, to work in a team/with others, to think creatively and solve problems. I’ve got practical skills, communication skills, academic writing skills and whatever else I could extrapolate from the last three years of education.
I am always furious when people dismiss the arts, any of them, because culture is the basis of well, culture! An existence without museums and galleries and music and theatre and entertainment and all the other facets of creativity would be hell.
I think one of the cockerels has migrated from down by the pond up to County/Bowland area. Either that or someone has the loudest alarm clock that sounds like one ever. I swear, every 10 seconds or so I can hear it cockadoodleooing.